How to Overcome Pornography: Employ the Aid of Accountability Partners

I’ve always heard that a problem shared is half solved. Well, the statement may not be entirely true but I know that in this context it does apply. What I’m saying in essence is that you should have a group of people you can talk to and you can report your progress to. These people are referred to as accountability partners. You are accountable to them.

Your accountability partners should be friends you can trust, parents who can understand you, your pastor to give you sound spiritual guidance and maybe even fellow addicts who have been able to overcome their own problem too. You may not necessarily hold meetings with these people but you should talk to them regularly. The truth is, the journey out of porn addiction is not easy and there will be time when you will feel dirty again God will seem far away and you will feel unworthy to talk to Him so these are people you can always turn back to. They will advise you and help you through the rough patch.

Your accountability partners will also help you monitor your progress and see how far you’ve come. Remember to be very honest with them, and despite the temptation to try to look good before them, remember that that will not help you either. So you must come clean before them. That is the only way they can help you.

Love Because You Have To

Love is not an action or a feeling as it were, love is a personality. Just as God is Love, we also have to be love.

A lot of people complain that love is overrated, love is a false feeling or that love is a waste of time. Well, in my opinion, I just believe that such people have no idea what love truly is and what it stands for. If you are able to understand that one should not give love because you he/she can get something in return, life would be so much better.

We have to learn how to love people simply because we have to, not because we can get something from them. God tells us that we should owe no man anything but to love. This means that the debt of love to others around us is the only debt that we are allowed to owe and that it is a debt that we can never fully pay.

So as today goes on, learn not just to show love because you can get something in return. Show love because you have to, because love is who you are. Remember that the best acts of love are shown to those who have no means to pay you back. Show love to someone today. Have a lovely day. 

The 'But' Around Your Neck

Hi there guys, it's been quite a while since I last posted on this blog. I've been offline because I and my classmates were on an excursion and I had very little access to the internet. Over the course of the excursion I got to learn very valuable life lessons which I shall be sharing with you lot over the next few days. Today's life lesson s about character and bad behavior.
I decided to title this entry 'the but around your neck'. The inspiration behind it is simple. The person driving us was a nice man. Very kind and friendly 'but' he had a big character flaw that would never make me consider him or refer him for employment to another person. His flaw: he was never willing to be corrected and he always felt he knew too much.
The fact is that no matter how good you think you are,a little 'but' around your neck could spoil who you are and what people see you as. Check yourself. What's you biggest character flaw. When you find it, work consciously towards curing yourself of it.

How to Overcome Pornography: Cut Off Your Sources

The next step to take in overcoming porn addiction after admitting it is a problem that can ruin you and identifying your triggers is to cut off your sources. Cutting off your sources is as practical a step as it gets and it involves a whole lot of self-discipline and self-assurance that you are ready to take your recovery up a notch. It implies that you are ready to be really serious with your recovery from porn addiction.

Cutting off your sources is a simple step. It involves breaking all those DVDs and CDs, using softwares on your computer to block all those sites you usually visit. At this point you really need to build up your self-discipline. Friends can also help you out here. You can ask a friend to put in a password for that software so you won’t be able to access those pornographic sites. You can also deprive yourself of internet services as long as possible to help you curb the addiction and ultimately put it out.

Moreover, if you are the type that gets access through your phone, that is your internet data plan and your BlackBerry subscription supports you in this wise, it is time you let go of that phone. Either you cut off your internet subscription so you can only browse in public places or you change your phone to one that cannot access the internet. This is for your own good and as I said earlier, it requires a whole lot of self-discipline.

At all cost you must sever all ties with things that grant you easy access to the internet and eventually to porn sites.

ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING

In school I have been put in charge of publishing a magazine and I was brainstorming this morning, with my partner, on people to add to our team. A lot of names popped up in my head and I suggested them to my partner but she kindly rejected them and I know why: ATTITUDE. Till forever, this truth remains, a bad attitude will always overshadow good talent. No matter how good you are at doing something, if your attitude is poor and your character deficient, you will hardly made headway in life.

I have come across so many talented people, who I will never take seriously simply because their attitude is distasteful. At the same time I have come across certain people who may not be so bright mentally but their attitude lights them up. They are delightful.

So today, as you go about your activities, remember: ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING, SO PICK A GOOD ONE.

THERE’S NO HAPPINESS IN THE WORLD’S APPLAUSE

I got this idea from Britt Nicole’s song ‘You’ and I think it’s time I penned it down because it has been hovering on my mind for quite some time. The song talks about seeking true love and finding happiness. The truth is that there’s never happiness when you live for the commendations of others and their applause. There is no happiness there. The only true happiness you will ever find is the happiness that comes with knowing that God loves you and would go to any length for you. This true happiness also comes from the satisfaction you get from fulfilling the purpose for which you were created. God created you not to be just another person but because there's a problem out there that He knows you can solve.

THE TEST OF FAITH

People are funny. When all is going fine, they are absolutely in love with God. The moment something negative come their way they begin to doubt God’s credibility and question His goodness. I can say this because I once was like that. Few years ago, I would blame God for all my demise because I felt it was His responsibility to see that nothing goes wrong with me and that all works out well perfectly. I never once considered the fact that God knew what He was doing. Every time something bad happened to me (especially financially) I would quote the Bible and ask God why He did not “provide for my needs according to His riches in glory through Christ Jesus”. This used to be my own major attack point. I was not wise enough to understand the rules of life.

When Are You Most Vulnerable to Give in to the Temptations?

We have established the effects that watching porn has on people now we want to look at the times when the temptation to watch it is strongest and when people are most vulnerable to give in to his temptation.

1. When you’re emotionally exhausted. This is one of the easiest times for anyone to fall into temptations. Emotions and performance go together. The better your emotions, the better your performance. Performance here refers the way we do things. When you’re emotionally exhausted, you get edgy easily. You’re too tired and you may not be able to resist much. Therefore, the temptation comes at a time like this.
2. When you are discouraged. It is easy to get

#WhatsYourExcuse

How to Deal With Difficult People

You will agree with me that people are different. This difference in personalities makes some people compatible while some others aren't. You will also agree with me that no matter where we find ourselves -at work, in school, at home and in public places- we will always come across people who are difficult to relate with. Some of these people are proud while some others just lack good communication skills. You will also agree with me that it is important for you to know how to get along with people so that life can be much easier for you. The more able you are to adapt to people's personalities, the better your chances are at living a freer life. Here's how you can deal with such difficult people:

HOW TO ENJOY WHAT YOU DO: TIP 5

Embrace the positives. Learn from and then ignore the negatives. No matter how hard or bad something is, there’s usually a bit of positivity to it as it is negative too. So dwell more on positivity than on negativity. Don’t ignore negative responses and feedbacks. Examine them, see what you can learn from them and then do away with them. Most times, improvement lies in negativity but dwelling on the negatives will only make you hate things more than ever. So instead, try to identify the positives in your work and embrace those positives.

MY ANNIVERSARY IS AROUND THE CORNER

Yeah, the one year anniversary of my blog is around the corner and I wanna celebrate with you guys so I'm thinking of creative ways to do so. I want you all to leave your suggestions and comments so we can all have a good time together. 

Also, leave comments or send me an email telling me how this blog has helped you and tell me which is your best article. You may be in line to win something. You just never know. I am grateful to God for you all. You are my motivation; the reasons I do what I do. God bless you.

Let's Talk About The Conscience...Your Conscience

I heard the story of a married couple who lived somewhere in town (obviously). They trusted each other so much. They had 2 cars and both of them possessed keys to the 2 cars. So one day the wife was driving by a hotel- a very notorious hotel.- and she saw her husband's car. That hotel was so notorious that anyone who lodged in did so to commit wrong. That's how bad it was. So the wife drove home, took a cab, came back to the hotel. Then she drove her husbands car and went on to hide it somewhere. When the husband returned late in the night her lied that he was involved in a robbery attack and his car was snatched. Unknown to him was that his wife knew the whole truth. He was cheating on her. His wife just pulled him by the nose and showed him where she had hid the car. He felt so ashamed and embarrassed. That's the world as we have it today. People lack good moral compass and their consciences are weak or even dead.

HOW TO ENJOY WHAT YOU DO: TIP 4

Understand what can make you happy and what makes you unhappy. Realize I did not say understand what makes you happy because in the first place you won’t be reading this article if you knew how to make yourself happy. But you must understand that happiness needs to come in if you must enjoy what you do. Also, know yourself enough to know what and what makes you unhappy- how and why it makes you unhappy. When you have discovered this, it is now your responsibility to avoid what makes you unhappy and embrace those things that can make you happy from that work. If you can’t find anything in that environment that can make you happy then I suggest you can bring in external sources of happiness into your work. I think that’ll help.

HOW TO ENJOY WHAT YOU DO: TIP 3

Set a reward for every task you accomplish. For example, if you like to watch movies, you can set that as a reward for yourself. For each time you accomplish a task, you get to watch a movie or buy yourself something. Make sure you do not reward yourself without accomplishing that task. Again this is where proactivity needs to come in and you must also be disciplined enough not to cheat yourself.

Help! I'm Addicted to Watching Movies...

Someone asked me to write a piece on how to curb movie addiction so here it is. I'm not much of a TV fan so I guess I may not know much about this but one thing I know is this "where your treasure is, there your heart lies." That's the basic principle that guides this sort of thing. You've got to search deep and ask yourself: "what are my priorities? what are the most important things in my life?" Once you're able to answer this question you're on your way to freedom.

Furthermore, the more time you spend doing more important things, the less time you have to watch movies. Also, it is important that you discipline yourself and learn how to pray to God everyday and study your Bible as well. In the process of doing this you begin to gain perspective on how important times is how much you need to invest and preserve all the time you have. You haven't got all the time in the world.

One More Thing To Note About Porn Addiction

While in my prayer time, I was mulling over the series I started on 'How to Overcome Porn Addiction' and the Holy Spirit reminded me of the most vital step towards recovering from this addiction. Earlier in the day I had seen two different videos on this topic as a form of research and in order to improve my content. What I noticed is that I have neglected the most important step. This step trumps any of the 7 steps to recovery and it is quite easy to remember. It is that you can never achieve freedom without understanding the place of Christ and the Grace He provides us.

Furthermore, the comment on the most recent step made me realize this. We can never achieve freedom from the addiction to porn if we do not even understand that it was what Christ died for. Christ died to set us free from the works of Satan and and sin. Pornography is still just the same sin as lying. There's no need to sugar-coat it. God sees the liar, the murderer, the adulterer and the porn addict as all the same: sinners. but the good thing is that God doesn't condemn them. He loves them as much as He loves those who are already sin-free.

How to Overcome Pornography: Identify Your Triggers

We have looked at the first step to recovery and overcoming porn addiction. We understand that we must acknowledge the problem can ruin us before we can actually overcome the addiction. The next step to overcoming porn addiction is to identify those things that trigger your craving to watch it. Different people have different triggers. For some people, it’s an emotion that triggers it and for some others it is something they see that triggers them. Whoever you are, and you’re addicted to porn, there is a particular thing that will trigger the longing within you. It is your responsibility to identify what that trigger is. I call it your responsibility because, quite frankly, no one will do it for you. It’s for you to take responsibility for yourself and step up your game if you truly want to rid yourself of this addiction.

Inspiration for Today...

HOW TO ENJOY WHAT YOU DO: TIP 2

Be proactive, no matter what the environment is like. Look for ways that you can input your own methods and ideas. Even if your boss is a rigid person, find your way around his rigidity. That’s what proactivity is all about. Proactivity also includes you being agile. It means that you mustn’t let a ‘no’ or a rejection keep you from doing what you’re doing. Add fun into it. Own your work and make it like your own personal kingdom where you’re lord over all.