The Inevitability of Fear

Source: Isabelle Allende http://lovequotes.symphonyoflove.net/

All intelligent people are afraid of something. Remember, we have defined intelligence as “acting in a way that is consistent with set goals”. Thus, an intelligent person is one who constantly acts in ways that is consistent with achieving his or her set goals. There is no human being that is devoid of fear. As humans, it is only natural and normal for us to be concerned about things pertaining to our survival or subsequent breakthrough; that’s how we’re wired. A courageous person isn’t usually the one who isn’t afraid. In fact, Mark Twain, the US writer and humorist expressed that “Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear- not absence of fear.

Becoming successful in life is not about whether or not you’re afraid. Being courageous isn’t about the extent to which fear is absent in your life. Instead, you are courageous to the extent to which you can suppress and walk over your fear and still accomplish all you need to. A courageous person is someone who has learned how to proceed, amidst several or certain fears. For example, my biggest fear about writing used to be that I wasn’t going to be able to keep up and be prolific. I also feared that people would reject my writings and pass them off as “nothing special they haven’t seen before”. Nevertheless, these fears, amidst many others, haven’t stopped me from starting this blog and writing to help all the people that care to read my writings. I have received several commendations from folks praising this blog and each time, I realize how easily fulfilled writing makes me feel and I consider how I would have allowed my fear get the better of, and limit me.

Fear is inevitable if you really care to know. Pause for a moment and let this sink in. You cannot avoid fear. However, you must learn to control your fear. Understand that fear is as a result of ignorance. The more limited your information, the more tense and insecure you feel. It is our ignorance that causes us to fear change, to fear the unknown and to avoid trying anything new or different. If you’re afraid of heading into something, probably because you feel you aren’t good enough at it or that you don’t know enough to start. Simply source for knowledge, whichever way you can, about such fear.

If you do not control your fears, they will begin to grow and control every aspect of your life. If you fear something, face it. Face it head on and get to working at it. Glen Ford, an actor once said, “If you do not do the thing you fear, the fear controls your life.” Therefore, understand that with the inevitability of fear, you must learn courage. For every fear, knowledge and courage are the answers. The more you know about a solution to your fear, the easier it is for you to make moves that result in your progress.

Brain Tracy, in the book ‘Goals!’, gives some practical steps with which you can analyze your fear. These steps must be addressed with utmost objectivity. Do not deceive yourself. Search yourself through and through whilst doing this:

Take a clean sheet of paper and, at the top, write the question, “What am I afraid of?”

Answer this question by filling out any and every thing, major and minor over which you experience fear and anxiety. You can start with the most common fears: the fears of failure or loss and the fears of rejection or criticism.

When you’ve made this list, organize the items in order of importance. This means that you must organize these fears in the order in which they have the greatest impact on your life and thinking or in the order in which they hold you back the most.

Once this is complete, then attack each fear, with your predominant fear coming first. In respect to this, write the answers to each of these three questions

How does this fear hold me back in life?

How does this fear help me, or how has it helped me in the past?

What will be my reward for eliminating this fear?

Do this for each of the fears written on your list. You must be as objective as objective can be. Once you’re through with this process you must begin the process of eliminating each fear. Practice make permanent. You must begin engaging consistently in acts of courage. That way, your fears will dissipate one after the other.

Adapted from ‘GOALS!’ by Brain Tracy. Copyright © 2003. Berrett-Koehler Publishers, Inc.